Smart or Funny?

I've noticed that in life, people are often characterized by very basic traits. I suppose that's human nature, but it's irritating. All of my life, I have been called "the funny one", when compared to my high-achieving sister, parents, friends, or other relations. Sure, it's wonderful to be considered funny. In fact, laughter is kind of my litmus test for friendship or acquaintanceship of any depth. If I can make you smile, or, better yet, laugh, within the first five minutes of knowing you, I am good to go. I can work with you, play with you, listen to you, talk to you, relate to you. I'm all set.

If I can't make someone even crack a smile, I worry. There feels like there is no common ground, no connection. And without that, you've got nothing.

So I'm fine with being funny, amusing, witty, whatever.

But does that mean I can't be considered intelligent as well?

Let me just say that I'm walking into this with the baggage of a family chock-full of PhDs. I mean, they're EVERYWHERE. Me, I only have two Master's degrees to my name. So I'm kind of a lightweight in my family.

But what I'm noticing, that is troubling to me, is that now that my children are both teens, I can't help them as much in school anymore. My husband (PhD) is not only a master of math, science and tech, but an amateur historian. I can really only contribute to my kids' educational challenges if they're speaking a foreign language, or writing something. I taught high school English, proofread in an ad agency, and have been writing stories, plays and essays for as long as I knew how to pick up a pencil.

What I worry about is my kids thinking, oh yeah, Mom, she's hilarious, but not that bright. My husband carries the mantle of his education from a VERY swanky school, with years of varied and intellectually challenging work to his name.

Obviously, I must not be a total airhead. My husband wouldn't be able to stand it. He gets annoyed with people who are ignorant, don't think, or aren't curious. I try not to be ignorant, I definitely think a lot, and am curious. But I'm more curious about human behavior, motives, actions, body language, backstory, creativity, self-expression, education, theatre, improv, teaching, than, say, molecular physics.

Does this preclude me from the Smarty-Pants Brigade? It shouldn't. Look, I know I'm not stupid (a word I actually NEVER use on people because it's just mean). But at times I find myself feeling intellectually dwarfed, not just by my husband, siblings and parents, but by my kids as well.

I mean, let's face it, they are already lapping me in so many academic subjects. I mean, I do my division the European way, so I can't help with even basic math. And I don't remember my Canadian history, except for the Seigneurial System. That's about it. And all the horrible violence in Quebec by the FLQ in the 70s. But nobody in New York gives a shit about any of that.

So, sometimes, I feel rather dumb. Or out of the loop.

It reminds me of when I was interning at the performing arts school in Boston with another grad student, I'll call her Renee. The sophomore students enjoyed spending time with both of us, but one kid actually said to my face, "You're the funny one, she's the smart one". And I never forgot it. It stung.

Can I not be smart and funny? I want it all. The high highs, the low lows, the creamy middles. No, that's a line from "The Simpsons". WAIT A MINUTE. That's a funny AND smart show.

It CAN be done. Doh, why didn't I think of that?